
We're blessed with a Pastor
with a great sense of humor.
Below is a tongue-in-cheek
comparison between
our pastor, Dennis Rupert,
and our
Savior, Jesus Christ.
All in fun. No disrespect intended
to Jesus Christ.
JESUS the Messiah |
DENNIS, the Pastor |
| Savior of sinners | a great sinner whose savior is Jesus |
| blesses children | blessed with eight children |
| knows His sheep by name | forgets names of children |
| person of the Trinity | graduate of Trinity Evangelical Divinity School |
| came to earth to live life in the pits with us | grew up on earth in Pittsburgh |
| founder of THE Church | organizing pastor of New Life Church |
| lives with His Father | lives with his father & father-in-law |
| creator of marital bliss | married to Sue Dittrich Rupert since 1976 |
| stills the storm and winds | puts storm windows in sills |
| healed paralyzed man | gets children to do chores |
| raises the dead | wakes teenage daughters |
| cleanses lepers | washes behind ears of youngest son |
| feeds five thousand | sometimes eats too much at pot blessing dinners |
| sees Nathanael under far-off tree | sees with eye glasses (near-sighted) |
| heals Centurion servant at distance | master of the TV remote |
| wept over Jerusalem | congregation groans at bad jokes in sermons |
| prayed in a grove of oil trees | attended Grove City College |
| casts out demons | takes out garbage |
| waiting for His bride the church, God's children | has a great burden for marriages and parenting |
| trains His disciples | loves to teach disciples |
| giver of all spiritual gifts | ministers in the gifts of teaching, encouragement, hospitality, and administration |
| curses fig tree | kills house plants |
| trains through modeling | plays with model trains |
| stands at door and knocks | has church key |
| calls disciples | emails elders |
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